Mrs. Euclid

Why 'Euclid'?.  I remember one snippet of his formula from high school geometry: " a straight line is the shortest distance between two points".  Mom has always had a very unique form of logical reasoning, and it is not the least bit linear.  She can take up the most irrational position, and defend it brilliantly.  There have been times when I told her 'the wrong family member went to law school; it should have been you, not me".


Let's take the early morning wake up call.  By early morning, I mean the time of day described   by Sinatra as 'The Wee Small Hours of the Morning".  Mom will begin, by calling "Ginny" ( which is my Sister's name) at 4AM.  Or she'll call her Sister, Lucille.  ( Aunt Lucille died almost 20 years ago).  I sleep in the living room, and Mom is in the dining room , so of course I wake up immediately and ask 'what is it, Mom?".  9 times out of 10, she wants to know the time.


So, I've been asking her since November 'why are you calling other people at 4Am.  She replied " I'm afraid to call you, because you'll get angry at me, so I call your Sister instead.  Oh, it's ok--I can go back to sleep because you are either calling a person who sleeps like the dead (Ginny) or one who sleeps with the dead ( Aunt Lucille).


Or, the other excuse was 'you answered me, so you were already wide awake".  I tried to explain that I have trained myself to wake up when she calls, but I can tell by the expression on her face that Mom isn't buying it..  A close family friend once tried to convince Mom that she was a leader, but Mom said "no, I could never take charge of people."  He replied without missing a beat " You are a follower who won't be led".


I must take Penny for a long walk and clean the kitchen